New Year’s Eve has come, and with it another decade has passed. We humans put a lot of emphasis on markers such as years, decades, centuries, but if you really think about it these things mean nothing on a universal scale. Nothing special happens throughout the universe every December 31. The stars don’t align perfectly, we don’t experience an intergalactic rift. All across the universe it is just another day, or whatever measurement people on other planets use. Yet, here on planet Earth it is a time of celebration, and reflection, a time to evaluate and take inventory of our lives.
A decade is a long time, at least to me. Maybe I will say different when I have reached 80. Maybe it feels such a long time because this was the most significant decade of my life. This was the decade I came of age, the decade I became a father, the decade that not only changed my life, but also everyone else in the world.
Ten years ago, I had not given thought to being a father or husband, nor to how hard it is to make ends meet, or how important it is to buy your first house. Ten years ago, all I was concerned with was what the next day would bring. I was 16, I had a job at the mall, I was doing well at school, I had a girlfriend that I spent every waking moment with, I had a car that I was paying for, I used the word “I” a lot back then. I couldn’t wait to go out into the world and change how it was ran. And if that didn’t work out, at least I would have a chance to be on my own for a while, to experience the walk of life I chose. Little did I know what that bitch destiny had in store for me.
11 months into the decade I found out I was going to be a father, and that began the wheels of change. Since then, well lets just say its been a learning experience. I have had ups and downs, struggles and triumphs. I did manage to get my high school diploma, and go to what I thought was a legit trade school. Both of which have got me nowhere. My marriage has survived a breakup, and several disasters. Watching my eldest son grow, I now know why people say “you are growing up so fast”. Watching my youngest grow, I know why they say “the right thing to do isn’t always the easiest thing to do.” I dedicated 6 years of this decade to a dead-end job, and now feel I have put 3 more into another. I have given my family somewhat more of a stable environment than what I had, so I got that going my way.
Bottom line, I have made some good calls and some bad calls. I have also developed the ability to learn from both. If there is one thing I could tell myself 10 years ago is: Life isn’t like one of those books where you turn to page 37 if you do this or to page 110 if you do this(when in reality you peak to see what you want). You are stuck with your choices, and all to often there is no going back.
